You know you have a 4x4 when...

1. If you use a hose to clean the inside and the outside
2. You can air up your tires without stopping at a gas station
3. When the best route from point A to point B is through the rockpile or over the mountain
4. When a scratch or a dent is a beauty mark
5. You roll it over and don't get upset
6. Your mom and sister can't get in without help
7. You judge every hill you see by how much fun it would be to climb
8. You get custom pin-striping from trail brush
9. If it takes more than 6 hours to get donuts
10. When you pull into the unplowed parking spots on snowy days
11. When you take your friends wheeling and they say "What trail? I don't see a trail!"
12. When you've been forced to add 4x4 to your spell checker
13. When you can see OVER a Suburban
14. You carry emergency supplies and clothing because you never know where you will end up
15. When your Nerf bars battle rocks and win
16. When it rains and you don't care that your tops and doors are off
17. When you drive around to look at Christmas lights topless
18. When you change your plugs in the parking lot at work on a break
19. If your Parts Dept. is on blocks behind your house
20. When you take your Mom wheeling and she has to help you flip the truck back onto its wheels again
21. You use an ice-scraper on the INSIDE of the windshield
22. You get more heat from holes in the floorboards than through the heater vents
23. Every page of your repair manual has greasy fingerprints
24. Passengers scream "DON'T ROLL IT!" when you take them wheeling
25. You spend more time under your truck than under your significant other
26. Winter comes and your can't remember where you left the roof
27. You spend more on car washes than on insurance
28. Even worse the car wash won't let you in
29. You fix almost everything yourself
30. When you feel sorry for someone in a $60,000 Toyota Land Cruiser
31. When you have all your credit card numbers memorized
32. When you slam the door and chunks of dried mud crumble to the ground
33. If you get asked to pick up your co-workers in a snow storm and get paid for it
34. Your "Significant Other" refuses to get in it
35. You are the only one on the street who doesn't plow their driveway
36. You are dating your mechanic to get a discount
37. You try to run the plow trucks off the road when it snows heavily
38. You can't hear your $200 stereo over the noise of your tires on the highway
39. You have a high-water mark INSIDE the truck
40. Any tire that isn't waist high looks like a bagel
41. You carry a set of steps with you at all times
42. You can't sneak into church late because the engine is too loud
43. You carry along enough tools to supply a small garage
44. You nickname your truck after the noises it makes or it's most damaging trail accident
45. You carry along a replacement part for every drive component on the truck
46. You know how to reinforce the windshield frame near the wiper arm
47. You're constantly getting passed on the highway
48. Your wallet is always empty
49. When you finally wash the mud off, everyone thinks you bought a new truck
AND THATS WHEN YOU KNOW YOU HAVE A REAL 4X4 HA HA HA